London 2012: Day 4

Finally Friday! I can't wait to sleep in tomorrow! Of course, after weeks of getting up at 6am, sleeping in is like 8am! :)

I was thinking about the quote "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels."

There is some controversy surrounding it, because it's apparently quoted frequently on pro-anorexia websites. I think anything used in a bad context can seem bad. In no way am I pro-anorexia. It's a very sad disease, and anyone suffering from it needs treatment, just like with any disease.

I was thinking about the quote today, because someone had left a plate of cupcakes out in the break room at work, and I asked myself if eating one of those cupcakes would taste as good as what it will feel like to step off the plane in England. Obviously, the answer was no. I passed on the cupcakes and didn't give them a second thought!

I'm looking forward to doing some grocery shopping this weekend. I want to try to bulk up my lunches and dinners so I'm not so hungry.

Weight: 374.2, down 4.2 pounds from my starting weight on December 15th. My scale was acting a bit fritzy, so after weighing myself 5 times, I played it safe and took the highest weight. Needless to say, I'm buying new batteries this weekend.

Mental Level: About a 6. I had a rougher day than I've had in weeks, though nothing compared to my usual "rough days". Again, this is on a scale of 0-10, 0 being on the ledge with a knife to my wrist and 10 being my perception of a normal functioning person.

Exercise Today: Excellent! In spite of my flagging emotional state I managed to walk up 16 flights of stairs today! Again, not all at once, but spread out over the course of the day; 2 flights here, 2 flights there. I also spent 30 minutes walking outside.

Food Intake Today: Very good here as well. According to my "Lose It!" app, I've consumed 2621 calories, but have burned off 621 calories with exercise, bringing me to a net 2000 calorie intake.

Inspirational Quote of the Day:
"What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself."
-Hecato, Greek philosopher

I was scanning through the Inspirational Quotes website to find a quote for today, and I saw a couple that were good, but I didn't want to "settle", I wanted to find a quote that when I read it, it brought a smile to my face, and was really relevant. This one did that! I truly have become a friend to myself!

Off to watch a little TV with Hans, then off to bed.

London 2012: Day 3

Here's my first "before" picture. You might think I'm a little silly for putting the "personal use only" across my picture. I saw someone else do it on a weight-loss blog, and thought it seemed a little paranoid. But then I saw someone's personal picture used in a diet pill ad, as the "before" picture. So, I may be paranoid, but I don't want to see a picture of me in some pop-up ad for diet pills! :)

Is it a wake-up call for me to see myself so straightforward as this? Yes, honestly it is a bit. You'd think I'd be pretty aware of how big I am, but I wasn't always this big, and somehow my mind still thinks I'm as small as I used to be. In my head, I don't think of myself as being fat. Sort of the opposite of what anorexics feel. They can be disturbingly thin, and still feel like they are fat and disgusting. Don't get me wrong, I don't walk around thinking I'm all that or anything. I know I'm big, but I guess in my mind I'm still about a size 18 or 20, not a 32.

So, here's today's breakdown:

Weight today: 376.8 lbs

Mental level: 9, on a scale of 0-10, 0 being standing on the ledge with a knife to my wrist, and a 10 being my perception of a normal functioning person.

Exercise today: I did 8 flights of stairs today, and 20 minutes walking around outside. My calves are feeling the burn of the stairs yesterday, but I'm working through it, because I know the more I do, the better I'll feel.

Food intake today: Very good! I'm at 2047 calories consumed, and 344 burned off, leaving me at a net calorie intake of 1703. We had our company Christmas party and I knew I would be too hungry to eat healthy if I didn't have something a little before the luncheon itself. I bought a salad from the cafeteria downstairs and had that before the luncheon, which made a big difference when it came to eating moderate portions there. Using the "Lose It!" app, I estimate that the salad was about 600 calories, and the plate of food at the luncheon was about 850. I'm counting the luncheon as my dinner, even though it was early in the afternoon. I'm going to bed pretty early, so just having water, or maybe a glass of milk should tide me over before bed.

Inspirational Quote of the Day:

"The future depends on what we do in the present." - Mahatma Gandhi

I Googled "inspirational quotes" and a website came up, with this quote right at the top. Perfect! If I want a different future than my present or past, I need to start making the changes now. The future won't be any different than the present if I don't start changing things.

London 2012: Day 2

Just a quick post to cover the bases, as it's past my bedtime.

Got a Doctor Who DVD from Netflix and 4 episodes with the good Doctor have used my evening.

So, just the basics:

Weight today: 376.2

Mental level: 9, again on a scale of 0-10, zero being standing on the ledge with a knife to my wrist and 10 being my perception of a normal-functioning person.

Exercise today: Brilliant! Walked up 12 flights of stairs! I don't think I've walked up 12 flights of stairs in the last year, but I did so in one day today! Not all at once. 4 flights at a time, 3 times today. Also walked outside the building for 30 minutes. (10 min each, 3 times, to catch my breath after the stairs!) According to the "Lose It!" app on my iPhone, I burned just over 500 calories with this exercise. Excellent!

Food intake today: Very good. According to the "Lose It!" app, I can consume just over 2500 calories a day and still lose at least 2 pounds a week. I consumed 2135 calories, but exercised 516 calories off, so that left me with a net of 1619 calorie intake. Very happy with myself.

Inspirational quote for today:
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
I took plenty of steps today, but I'm on my way to London, and I've taken my first step today!

Off to bed!